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Good intentions...

I cheated on my boyfriend

Thursday, June 9, 2016 2:50 PM by Guest Rating: +23|-5

I've been with my boyfriend (partner?) over 5 years - and never cheated on him. Never even thought about it. It's a bit complicated but before we got together a friend of mine had a crush on an older guy, divorced, who made it clear he was interested in me. My friend actually stopped speaking to me over this but I wasn't interested in her crush. Until... things with my partner hadn't been great for some time; work issues, he was always tired, not interested in sex, or seeing me. I spent a lot of time crying and lots of lonely nights.

So I start bumping into this older guy ...actually I would run into him frequently over the years and he might facebook me and say he'd like to meet up but I always just laughed it off. Finally after 6 years I thought 'okay, at least I'll finally meet him and shake hands' so we did. We met, he drove and talked to me until I asked him to take me back home. So he did. He asked me if we could see each other again and I said 'no' but I couldn't get him out of my mind. Don't ask why... We have met maybe 8 times in 4 months - very secret - no sex. Until last week. He had told me he's never felt this level of desire and closeness ( a woman)  and was surprised that this has happened at his age (he's 49).  I had decided to break it off but when we met, he smiled, I smiled...and went back to his place.

He showed me all round as if he was selling the property and I was a potential buyer; it made me laugh; what was I doing there...anyway, we had sex but it was the most amazing experience, like flying, it was absurd. It felt so right -and yet - here I was, totally naked in HIS bed. Getting undressed is an issue for me, I have scars from a major car accident, but when I told him this he just covered my legs with kisses. He kept saying 'I can't believe it's you' so I suppose it was intense for him, too. After sex he just held me and kissed me for ages and we had sex again. Then more cuddling and kissing until finally he took me home. We did it again a week later. So, I've become what I said I wouldn't - a cheater.

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Friday, June 10, 2016 10:09 AM

Please explain when this guy showed interest why you would not break up with your boyfriend? it does not make any sense. and this guy is clearly bottom of the barrel and has no respect for you since he know you had a boyfriend. 

Friday, June 10, 2016 5:37 PM

I would also like to know where you came up with good intentions as your title??? what in this story started with good intentions?

Saturday, June 11, 2016 8:03 AM

it was ironic

Monday, June 13, 2016 1:17 PM

how is this ironic? There is nothing humorous about this situation

Tuesday, June 14, 2016 4:19 AM

if you truly love someone then you're supposed to love them even when things are bad. its called being supportive and loyal. best tell your boyfriend now and stop wasting his time and your time. all i see is mad disrespect and deceit flying everywhere.

Tuesday, June 21, 2016 12:53 AM

Monday, June 27, 2016 8:20 AM

Keep cheating if it makes you feel good... I love it. 

Saturday, July 2, 2016 8:43 AM

your husband might be cheating as well... find out if it's true then breakup...

Wednesday, July 27, 2016 4:17 PM

Something similar happened to me. I loved my significant other with all my heart but he became very disconnected. We rarely had sex and we basically became roommates. A guy pursued me and we had crazy off the charts chemistry- it was the perfect storm. 

It took me 3 months to figure out what to do. I decided to leave the relationship (not for the other guy) but for the 50 years I have lef t to live. I want to find a partner to share life with. Being single is not easy and I miss my ex everyday- but sometimes love isn't enough. I know I'm making room in my life for possibilities I would not have had in my old relationship.

There are days I hate myself for what I did. There are others that I'm reminded of why I did this. My relationship had deteriorated into something I could not recognize like the song Torn. 

Just think about what you want. Love and commitment are precious but don't give up on what you want out of life. If your relationship with your current partner can be mended- then mend it. If you are just too different- then you have your answer.  Sometimes we grow apart instead of together


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