Tuesday, April 5, 2016 11:57 PM by Guest
We have been together for 10 years. We have been married 5 out of the 10. My husband and I have been through a lot of ups and downs. He is very sweet but sour like a sour patch candy. He's romantic, intelligent and emotional. He has taken on many challenges brought on by my ex who I have a child with. But he also had sex with another woman before we were married and as a result I ended up with herpes. He also has hurt me physically and mentally in the past. But as he and I got older he matured. He stopped the physical abuse and we have learned to live with this disease. I forgave him but I still keep one eye open. He hasn't yet found a way to master his emotions when he let's off steam talking down to me but he honestly slowed down a lot. Now I know it might seem stupid but I love him. summer of 2013 his mom passed away and he was heart broken. I wanted to be there for him and tried to the best way I know how but I honestly didn't know how. He thinks I didn't care. I also coincidentally at that time was having a mid life crisis. I didn't feel like I was special anymore. I understand he was morning but I needed him just as much as he needed me. And he never really made me feel special verbally. By early fall he told me he was leaving me because of the issues he had with my ex. My ex had made CPS reports but God had our back and the reports were dismissed...but his career field is not one that plays around with those kind of problems. And he felt it would be better for him to leave. Remember I'm still in my mid life crisis and I started to feel even more low and out of control. I ended up talking with a guy I knew from college who fed me a lot of positivity and ended up cheating on him. Afterwards I felt worse and knew I just made the biggest mistake ever. I took it upon myself to get counselling and I ended up deciding to keep it to myself instead of causing more shake on a already slippery slope relationship. Afterwards my husband cheated on me. He claims he did it as revenge because he found out about the affair. Took me some time but I forgave him. 1 1/2 years later I told him the truth about my affair. He was so upset I didn't tell him but even more upset because it happened within the same year his mother passed. I feel like shut, scum, ex.... I honestly don't want a divorce and I want our family to stay together. But should we? I think if we get therapy and treat each other good we can over this. What do you think?