My boyfriend and I had been together for more than two years. I remember our courtship where he tried to get with me for months. I eventually gave in and fell for him.

A year and a half into our relationship, he had to move to Africa for a temporary work assignment. We made it work because he returned home five times a year for business or vacations. The distance made us stronger and more communicative. We constantly texted each other throughout the day and had some FaceTime every week. I trusted him.

However, since April of this year, we had been fighting about the quality of our time spent together during his visits. We took a little break and patched things up within days. He then returned in July for my birthday. We celebrated, and it was lovely, but we fought again about time spent together and also about me meeting more of his family. I admit I was a bit anxious and brooding, which pushed him away. I snapped at him in frustration of not being able to be more serious in our relationship. He begged me to be patient and wanted to work things out, but I just wanted to know he was committed. We fought again. 

Then after two weeks, I reached out, angrily, he said it was too late and he had started seeing someone else. 

I was crushed. 

Just weeks ago, he seemed head over heels. At my birthday dinner, he even suggested I come live with him. 

How could he change his heart like that? Does this woman exist or was she made up to get back at me for initiating that fight? If she is real, how long have they been together? Did they just hook up after our fight, or has this been going on while we were together?

It's been more than a month now since we fell out. We haven't spoken. I still have mixed feelings--both of longing and of anger toward him. We haven't blocked each other yet. But as much as I can, I try to focus on building myself up and trying to be the best version of myself. Every now and then though, I am overwhelmed by thoughts of his betrayal and giving up on us...