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Texting for Years

I cheated on my wife

Tuesday, July 5, 2016 9:24 PM by AB Rating: +23|-26

I'm 32, and I've been married for nearly 8 years. My wife is a doctor in the final year of her training, and I am a graduate student pursuing a Ph.D. in music. I've known my wife and have been her companion since 2002. 

Throughout our marriage and the courtship prior, I have been involved with texting relationships that have been emotionally charged and sometimes sexual in nature. Our last count was somehting like 15 women, 8 before our marriage and 7 since, but that count is likely +/- a few women. This problem has come up a couple times, but I'd always downplay it or make it seem as if my wife were making something out of nothing. In my head, I separated the texting relationships from my real marriage, when now I've realized that I actually cheated. Many, many, many times. 

We had something really special, and I'm coming to realize that it is very likely over. I am devastated, but I can't imagine her pain.  I feel like I am empowered to change, but I don't think she is confident that I can. Please advise. 

Thank you for voting.

Comments

Wednesday, July 6, 2016 11:28 AM
Jayson

Wierd

 
Wednesday, July 13, 2016 10:33 PM
Guest 1

Hi. Can you please provide more detail on whether you have physically cheated since started dating your wife? If you are only texting but never kissed or had sex with others, then this can indeed be fixed, and no need to over-estimate your wrongdoing. 

H

 
Sunday, July 17, 2016 2:28 PM
Guest

the emotional act is actually more of an issue to women than the physical act itself so yes you screwed up royally. I said you could change, but did not say if and why you deserve a second chance with this woman. Why should she give you a chance or believe you can change? I am glad you saw the error of your ways but again from the info I have there isnt really a reason for her to forgive you.

 

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Expert's opinion is limited to the information presented, and is to help you consider options; it is not and cannot take the place of a counseling session. By reading this, you agree that none of the experts offering information are liable for actions you or others take. If you feel that counseling could be helpful, please look up counselors available in your area.
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