One of the great secrets that men learn only too late is that many women who have experienced menopause no longer need or want sex. In fact, if they have a good job and the children are raised, it would surprise me if the marriage endures. Clearly one of the best solutions--morality aside--is for a man to have a mistress who takes care of his sexual and emotional needs. There are several benefits for the mistress, too, and this arrangement has worked for many, many years. There are many single women out there who prefer to date married men as they are less likely to want a romantic, monogamous relationship and of course kids would be out of the question. The assumption would be that safe sex is practiced and discretion is maintained and the smart man will realize that he probably won't be the only one his mistress is seeing.
How then does one go about finding a suitable mistress? Hundreds of thousands--if not millions--of married men have simply lied about their status and led some single woman on until she finds out and ends it, sometimes with dire consequences. Some of these women might continue the relationship in the hopes that he will dump his wife and turn all his attention to her, which doesn't happen very often.
There are cheating websites and social networks and perhaps those work to some degree. First off though I think our philandering fellow needs to decide if he is going to be open about his marital status or not. If not, then he just does his best to appear single and enjoy the deal until it blows up. On the other hand, if he wants to be clear upfront about the relationship he is seeking he would do well to remember one basic truth: There is always some form of agreement and some form of payment involved when it comes to sex. Put a ring on her finger and enter into a legal contract. Make a proposal to a potential mistress and recognize that she needs to get something out of the deal--other than the guy's proclaimed charm and sexual prowess.
If it were only about money then our guy could just hire a pro or an escort and sidestep emotional entanglements. If he's looking for more exclusivity and the friendship that comes with a mistress, then he has to come up with something she wants, too. Men with wealth have been known to pay for their mistress' apartment, clothes, car etc. Those without the means to do so have to find something else that she wants. This is where it gets a bit sticky, as one can never assume what it is she wants or if she is telling the truth about it. Maybe what she really wants is your sperm.
It's really tough on older guys (55+) who struggle to attract young single women (18-29), the group with the least life experience and those who are most likely to play along for something other than money. As most women age they learn to stay away from married men as they have been burned before and are somewhat jaded. And while it is true that some older men are happy with a mistress in their own age bracket, it defies the author's logic as to why, with the possible exception of trading off youthful vigor, firm body, and sexual stamina for experience and a higher score percentage as the older women are realistic about their prospects with younger men, too, and will take what they can get rather than what they desire.
Personally, I'm not at a point where I am looking for a mistress to keep me invigorated in my late 50s and in a long-term marriage that seems more like a prison sentence than a joyful union. I've had torrid affairs in the past (stories for another time) and the costs were high despite the sex with the much younger women being very good. No, I'd settle for a girlfriend. A younger woman who laughs at my jokes and appreciates the attention. A woman who isn't sure she wants to be a mistress but enjoys my company and can keep my attention without having to put out. A flirt and a tease, but not a malicious one who enjoys leaving men unfulfilled.
Listen up younger men! Get it figured out before you are too old to play the game with the nubile young nymphs. Else you will wake up one day with just your memories and the regrets of not having lived it up while you could. And find yourself looking for a mistress.