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To my baby. The one that takes my hopes for stupidity

My girlfriend cheated on me

Tuesday, December 22, 2015 1:13 AM by Sasha Rating: +2|-9

I've been dating this girl for 6 months now. Our relationship started as casual but I quickly started developping feelings for her and one month later we were living together.

Physically she is okay. But I'm good with it since what I liked the most about her was her personallity and the " I don't give a s*it as long as I'm true to myself" attitude. I felt in love with that. I felt in love the "I'm a honest girl" image she painted to me. 

Long story short. The 2 first months were incredible. I invested my self alot into this relationship. Having known a long series of failed relationships because of dishonesty I thought that this girl was the perfect match for me and that this relationship would be the light at the end of the tumnel for me. What I didn't know is that that light was coming from the fire of hell that was awaiting for me.

After the 2 fisrt months, because I was facing some financial struggles, I wasn't spending that much of time at home anymore. Kmowing exactly what I was going through, she was telling me that it was okay and she even provided for me during that period and still doing it now. However, while I thought I was building up something new, the truth is that I was digging the foundartons of my abisses.

Time went and I started feeling that something wasn't right. Something was odd about her. After confronting her and pressuring her to tell me what was going on, she admitted that she have cheated on me with a guy that she have no contact with anymore.

This is without stating that she changed the facts and the timeline of her story 3 or 4 times during the weeks that followed her confession. Eventhough I ended up believing her, or lets say I forced myself to believe her srory since she told me that she was just afraid of my reaction and that she didn't mean to and that she was forced into it and that she will never do it ahain and that she even never tjought about doing it.

However, that feeling of oddness is till persisting and I still feel deep in my gut that something odd is going on. She is very secretive kind of girl. The kind that is thinking deeply about what is going to say and how is going to act. And she is really good at it. Without getting into details of how and when, I found out that she have had multiple affairs behind my back. She doesn't know that I know and I still have some hope that she is going to admit what she was and still doing. If not to save our relationship at least for the good times we spent together.

Anyway, my feelings for her are fading away. I'm with her mostly because of the help she provided for me so far and also because of the feelings I'm still holding for her. Thinking about the lies she have been spoon feeding me I just feel disgusted and about her behaviors even more. I'm working on an exit plan so far which is going perfectly well. However, I don't want to be unfair and punish her for something she haven't done since so far I haven't seen anything with my own eyes. 

What would you do in my position? Should I leave her asap or wait and see? I don't what to do or how to feel anymore. 

Tags: Dating;

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