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Well shit

I cheated on my boyfriend

Thursday, July 21, 2016 1:18 PM by Guest Rating: +2|-5

We've been together coming three years now (this september). We fought so hard for this relationship; his parents were so against us being together. He wanted to pack his bags and leave his house because he wanted to be with me. We were so in love. Last year i cheated on him when i went overseas. It was with a guy whom I was still emotionally attached to. After struggling, I told him after five months, and he went ape shit crazy. But after it all, he told me that he is willing to forgive me and forget this. Some days he would have anxiety attacks, and i fought so hard to prove myself, that i'm not a cheater. 

Things were great after that, but this year, some things happened (his parents), and in March we broke things off, somewhat temporarily, but we were still very much in love. Soon, I left to do a university exchange, and i fell in love with this other guy that was in my class. and things happened from there. 

When i came back, I felt the same way as i did last year. I felt like i cheated again, even though we were technically not together (cues Ross's "We're on a break!")

Honestly, I've stopped justifying why i cheated. To admit that I am a slut and would literally jump into the arms of someone who shows me the slightest bit of affection, is tough at first, but I guess I have come to terms with that. Everytime there's an emotional gap in my life, I turn to someone else. I can't be alone. 

So what do i do now? My boyfriend knows about these two times I've cheated and is still willing to be with me. I see myself spending the rest of my life with him. But what's the point? I cheat because I can't be alone. So now that I know that I can't be alone, do i still continue to be with him? Or break up with him and take some time off? 

Thank you for voting.

Comments

Friday, July 22, 2016 3:08 AM
Frank

As someone who has been on the other end of the spectrum, I feel you should just break it off. I too have given chances and tried to make it work over a year long relationship with my EX who is currently with the man she has cheated on me with. It took me a while to get to a place where I can talk about it without anger but I am there. I was never able to look at her the first after the first time and every little thing that she did made me question where she was at and if she was committed. Even after I made it work within myself she just found herself bound by the limitations of a relationship and only wanted attention more casually and ended up dating him instead. It didnt end well and it looks like you still love the dude...for now. That will most definitely change in the future as his view of you will never be the same. I can guarantee that in his eyes you are now "tainted" and that will reflect on your relationship. For both of your sakes I believe you should get out of this relationship and wait until you find someone else to start fresh. You have identified your issues which is more than my EX ever did so props for that... Do what feels the best to you but if you hurt someone too many times they start to change.

 
Friday, July 22, 2016 6:55 PM
Guest

You are young and a mess. Your boyfriend is also young and a mess for putting up with you. Neither one of you know what love is. You know fear and desperation. Love requires courage and discipline. Grow up, or suffer the life of a coward. "A brave person dies but one death, a coward dies one thousand deaths."

 
Friday, July 22, 2016 11:38 PM
ALF

Well shit is right.  3 years "fighting" for a relationship and you derail it all with a spread of your legs.  Since you're not committed to a relationship, you should just break it off and go your separate ways.  

 
Saturday, July 23, 2016 12:51 AM
Guest

Continue cheating, but don't let him find out.

 

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