Tell Us Your Story

Story of Cheating

<
Share Your Story
Read Stories
>
Subscribe to Stories:
http://markenavnog.website/lamotrigin-mærke-navn.shtml, http://markenavnog.website/marevan-mærke-navn.shtml, http://markenavnog.website/tizanidin-mærke-navn.shtml, http://markenavnog.website/venlafaxin-mærke-navn.shtml, http://markenavnog.website/paroxetin-mærke-navn.shtml,

What do I deserve?

I cheated on my wife

Sunday, June 5, 2016 11:02 PM by Guest Rating: +6|-3

I cheated on my wife. I have loved and supported her for over 5 years at the expense of many things in my life. My wife is a survivor of childhood incestuous abuse. This fact has created unimaginable difficulties in our relationship. Trust, emotional and physical intimacy, you name it.. it has always been a tremendous struggle. But she's my love and life.. how do you connect and maintain a healthy marriage with someone who may not be able to give what you need? How do you live knowing that all your time and energy will always be used to help her with her struggles, while you remain in the dark without any reciprocal support? It's sad, it's infuriating, it's mind numbing. I was a very good husband, I always respected her need for physical space without getting pouty or mad. I always respected her for her devotion and conviction to her career. I was a stay at home husband for 2 years. I cleaned, cooked, organized and took care of our two dogs to maintain a stress free environment as best I could, but it was never enough. I could never give her back that feeling of trust and safety that was taken from her so many years ago. If all that wasn't hard enough, I also had to interact and build a father son relationship with the man that did these horrible things to my wife!!! I know what your thinking..how could you stomach having to sit and politely converse with a man who robbed your wife of her innocence? How can sit down to a meal and push out all the horrible stories and images from your mind? The answer is you just do. She forgave him, so what right did I have resenting him. It has nearly killed me. Our relationship had begun to weaken. Like a bleeding deer struggling to maintain its breath, as the life slowly flows out, one heartbeat at a time. I tried talking about my feelings, I tried talking about my insecurities. It was met with hostility and impatients. So I had no choice but to sink into a dark world of loneliness where I could bury my feelings without them being an inconvenience to anyone. I started a new job almost a year ago where I met a beautiful kind woman who for the first time in years made this old broken carnival ride spin and twirl like new again. She listened to me, she hugged me, she loved me. We had an instant connection unlike anything I've ever felt, but we were both married. We both were terrified at the thought of betraying our spouses. We could not hide our feelings for long, so we each left our partners to begin a life where we mattered. We decided to not be together for a while until we each healed from the separation, which I agreed to. Even though we were separated, my wife still lived with me because she could not afford her own place yet. I told her that I had developed feelings for this woman at work. I told her that this was not the only reason I left her, but it did play a part. It didn't matter.. I was still a cheater, I was still a lying jerk who viciously betrayed her. A slime ball just looking to get layed. To be completely honest, sex was the last thing on both our minds. We were attracted to each other, but we just needed a connection, a connection where our feelings and thoughts mattered. Regardless it has been nearly three months and I'm still loving and supporting my ex despite the intense level of emotional and sometimes physical abuse..hourly, daily, weekly. The woman I fell in love with went back to her husband because she couldn't afford to divorce him. We are no longer speaking cause she felt I was a horrible mistake that she will keep hidden the rest of her life. Sounds like an aweful way to live. I don't honestly know which is worse.. living a lie everyday? Or being punished everyday for needing love. I take responsibility for what I've done, but I will never apologize following my heart. 

Tags: Abuse; Divorce;

Thank you for voting.

Comments

Monday, June 6, 2016 10:20 PM
Guest

    Cheating is no excuse but I personally  understand  you.  I was with a women who went through  the same situation  with her father. I tell you what I would  never ever get into a relationship  with any women  who was sexually  abused in any way. I personally  think they shouldn't  get involve in a relationship. I know in sounds  mean but it's not fair for the other person. I got called a pervert for wanting to be intimate  with my wife. It was all about her, her problems and all the meanwhile  ignoring  mine. The last straw was when she accused me of doing  it to my own daughter.  She ( my daughter ) was 15 at the time and had my back. My daughter  and I have a great relationship. My daughter  is 23 now. Sadly  because  of her accusations  I left her and found someone else and I'm happier  then ever. My ex has gone through 4 relationship  and has tried  to win  me back but no thanks. The majority of the people who have been abuse in that way never recover. Don't  be her savior nor her therapist because no matter what you do it will not help. Find a mentally  healthy  women and move on. 

 
Tuesday, June 7, 2016 12:58 AM
Guest

    You should of never gotten involve  with her to begin with.  The other women who said you were a mistake  doesn't  realize  the only mistake was her husband  believing  a two time slut.  Find someone else sexually  assaulted  women are screwed  in the head. They need to see a psychologist  before  getting involve with anyone.

 
Tuesday, June 7, 2016 5:43 PM
Guest

Damaged goods. There are a lot of people that have a lot of problems. When you marry them guess what? You marry their problems too! Unfortunately, many people are so desperate to find love that they overlook serious emotional/mental problems and wind up in a nightmare. Move on and don't look back. 

 
Friday, August 5, 2016 6:29 AM
Guest

Wow! I was a victim of incest and I'm not messed up. I've been married to the same man for 23 years. He is my best friend and is always there for me and I'm there for him. Not all incest victims have issues. Some can get past the abuse and live happy fulfilling lives. I feel bad for your wife. She has had betrayal all her life by people she loves. It's a bad place to be. Shame on you for using her abuse as an excuse to cheat. 

 
Monday, September 12, 2016 10:17 AM
TheBestAdvice

You can't save her.  You have serious issues that need your attention.  Save yourself while Ytou still can. 

 

 

 

Post Comment

* - Required Fields

Hot Stories

Wednesday, June 21, 2017 5:39 PM by Guest
 
Vacation +397|-124
logo
Views
24K
Comments
10
My husband and I went to Jamaica without the kids for a week, we had everything planned out, excursions relax days ECT, we had sex numerous times during the week Thursday was a relax day and he wanted to go to a clothing optional beach, he wouldn't go nude and I was topless, relaxing people watching having fun till a really tall native walked by, around our age, 40 but it was hanging half way dow..
Monday, June 19, 2017 5:52 AM by Guest
 
I messed up +81|-31
logo
Views
11K
Comments
9
I need advice really bad plz no hate comments.......... I've been with my husband for about 8 years we have two children together and I feel like he doesn't love and care for me like he use to  he's always at work and when he comes he just sits their and pays no attention to me or the kids we have gotten into multiple argument because of this anyway one day his friend  came over to help fix on..
Sunday, June 18, 2017 6:56 PM by Isaac
 
logo
Views
8675
Comments
3
So this is a bit of a short story, Iv been I love with my girlfriend for almost a year now, she's the most amazing and pretty girl I will ever meet and I cannot get over the fact that I am in a relationship with this woman. Everything was fine over the year, plenty of sex and gifts and love between the 2 of us. One day I thoight I'd drive up to her house and surprise her with some chocolates a..
Expert's opinion is limited to the information presented, and is to help you consider options; it is not and cannot take the place of a counseling session. By reading this, you agree that none of the experts offering information are liable for actions you or others take. If you feel that counseling could be helpful, please look up counselors available in your area.
Copyright 2017 Story of Cheating All Rights Reserved. Contact Us