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When I Wake From This Dream

My girlfriend cheated on me

Saturday, December 31, 2016 5:36 AM by Jey Rating: +38|-17

Where do I even begin. Guess I gotta start somewhere. My girlfriend and I have been together for 3 years. She was a dream come true. We spent literally everyday together. 2 1/2 years into our relationship, we decided to do God's will and stopped having sex until we got married. This was a very tough decision, because we had sex pretty regular before. We decided on a date to get married (December 10, 2016). We picked that day, because it was the day of my mom's birthday. Long story short, I recently found out she was having an affair with someone claiming to be a celebrity since March 2016. The money I was giving her; she was giving it to him. How could I be so blind this whole time? Truth is, I trusted her with my life. What hurt me the most is I was 1000% honest and faithful to her. I never even thought about stepping out on her, because she was my everything. Now, my trust will never be the same with anyone. I gave her everything but she only fed me with lies. This experience has made me very bitter. Being faithful is something I've valued since a teenager but now, I never want to be faithful again.

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Sunday, January 8, 2017 12:05 PM

i know how you feel  im so sorry you have to go through that ):

Sunday, January 8, 2017 12:07 PM

It saddens me to hear that just because you were hurt by one person, that you wouldn't want to be faithful to another person ever again.  If you were to fall in love again, could you really bring yourself to hurt that person just because you were hurt by another?  What if that person was faithful to you? That doesn't seem fair.  That being said, I think you are an amazing person for holding true to what a loving relationship should really be. Even with all the effort you put in to the relationship, and all the hurt you are feeling, consider yourself lucky.  You didn't get married and you don't have children with her.  You now have an opportunity (without all the red tape and a messy divorce) to find someone who is worthy of your love and faithfulness. There ARE women who think and feel like you. I have never been unfaithful to my husband, nor do I want to, because I love him, I love my children, and I believe in integrity.  We exist.

No one wants to be betrayed by the person they cherish, and no one wants to feel the pain and the anger that comes with it. But they do, because they're human. Humans also heal and learn, and often become better and stronger because of it. 

It's going to be hard, but you need to move on and not let her betrayal discolor any future relationships. Yes, you will be more cautious, that's to be expected, but don't vent your revenge on someone who doesn't deserve it.  I hope you do heal and in the future find another love.  Be sure to make it clear right away that you believe in monogomy and faithfulness in a relationship, and that you expect the same.  Look for women who are open and honest, and are willing to let everything in their lives be an open book to you, and you likewise.  My husband and I don't hide our phones, our computers, or anything, from each other.  Find someone willing to do the same, and if they're not, then heed that red flag and move on again.  Until then, stay busy, spend time with your friends and family, enjoy the small things, and keep looking forward. Good luck.

Just in case you get swayed if she tries to win you back:


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