Friday, April 22, 2016 10:45 PM by Not-so-happy
i dated my wife for 5 years and after the 3rd yr I knew this was the girl. Today we've been together a total of 12yrs. We became pregnant and I put a ring on it. a couple months after we married I met a girl with whom I had a sexual affair for 6 months. This affair culminated in a pregnancy. My son with my wife is 7 and my daughter with this other girl is 6. I cofessed to my wife immediately and she forgave me, even accepted my daughter into our lives, however it hasn't been easy. Even thou we moved away she has insecurity issues, reminds me on a weekly basis of my infidelity and basically hasn't been a happy person and it's understandable. I put her in a hard situation that because of my daughter it keeps evolving (me taking to the mom, my sister becoming friends with this girl, etc etc) but in my mind we should enjoy our lives and don't worry too much about what they do. We live in Florida and our families, including my daughter are in Philadelphia. I visit my daughter every 6 weeks and I bring her home during the holidays/ school breaks.
long story short my wife asked me for a separation 6 months ago and 2 months ago asked for a divorce. 2 weekends ago she tells me she's going to a "spa retreat", so she went and after doing some digging and looking at her passport I found out she went out of the country to her country of origin. She goes back about every 3 months and I have no problem whatsoever, she didn't have to lie to me! So I confronted her and instead of asking why she left the country I asked her how long has she been cheating on me and with who. And to my disgrace she's been having an affair for the last 3 yrs, mostly emotional but physical every time she went over there. She fell in love with this dude and he has left his wife.
She tells me she's been preparing herself to come clean because she knows she's wrong. Also tells me she doesn't want us to get a divorce yet and for me to thing about forgiving her and that maybe this is out opportunity to start from zero.
I'm not as upset about the cheating as I am about the fact that she has made feel like an ass the last 6yrs because I cheated on her and had a baby. I know she has a good heart and I love this woman and I'm also ready to forgive but things have been so corrupted and distorted that I don't know if it's worth it. I'm a nice guy, work hard, good sense of humor and i want is to be a good father and be happy.