I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years now and he is my first boyfriend. I met him in College in my final year but there is another guy.

I knew this other guy for years ( he took me on my first date i liked him for years) I went to his and I made him dinner he said he;iked me but I turned him down. I explained I liked another guy , so i wanted to start seeing him. turns out this guy didn't like me, I took this guy for granted ( that I mde dinner for) then we got into an argument ( he just basically called me out on everything) I tried to get my sster to talk to him but he wasn't hearing it. he tried talking to me but i ignored him as I had a boyfriend but on graduation I just couldn't helped my feelings.  He said sorry for what happened but i blanked him. we ended up hugging. 

he text me and ignore him first ( but i do facebook stalk him still) so i replied when he changed his photos. it was short so he explained that i was sad and whatever and need to grow up as i have never apologised for what I had done.

anyway about a year later i get a message saying he feels bad how things turned out ( as we were very good friends), but now here my confusion starts.

It was a year and a half and he texts me and it wasn't to make up it was just to tell me all this stuff about how it was bad how things turned out and he aplogised fr swearing at m and name calling. but he didn't aplogise for defending himself. so we get into it, and i said he wasn't a good friend as he just shouted at me. i may of touched a nerve he said

" susch a good friend? he supports me when i was going through mental health difficulties and in return I bad mouth him but don#t worry its all because he likes me righ? he explained he will delete my number and i will never here from him again.

but im confudes and hurt so a couple of days later i reply denying what he said( i lied) but also said i was hurt by what he done. he said he doesn't want to be friends with me or anything but always regretted not talking this out and now he has, he felt i took him for granted never tried to speak to him and its always him trying to make peace and he has had enough.

but i'm so angry with him , why am i so angry and confused I have a boyfriend which I love but I feel so upset about him and now he is gone i feel so hurt and i'm not sure why. we were never a couple i turned him down and have a long term boyfirend but i always reply but now he is gone i feel so confused.

can someone please just help make sense of all this