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Soon to be cheated on

My wife cheated on me

Monday, April 18, 2016 3:05 AM by GeorgeV Rating: +32|-6

the wife and I have been happily married for 29 years.  Well I thought anyway.  Over the last 5 years, about the time my girls grew up and moved out my wife's personality had changed. She's always kept herself fit and trip, very pretty, sexy and classy. With all of my heart I loved this woman. My curiosity rose when she went to AC with her female friend for the night. Her friend is an avid card player, my wife does not gamble so I was curious but to keep her friend company (I was told) she would join her.  I tried to call at midnight to sa good night as I was going to sleep at home, no answer, I tried again at 2am, 3am and finally at 6am I get a text that she's tired and now going to bed. I called her friend who informed me that my wife was in fact not by her side and she was absent til early 6am this morning. Where would she go by herself for 6 hours and not be able to answer her cell?  She returned and was upset with me for calling her and her friend.  I just blew it off.  At a holiday party I was with some buddies and looking across the room I see my wife shaking her breasts for a man.  He was enjoying and I could her him tell her how hot and sexy she is. He's 10 years younger. I walk over, he gets up almost panicked I just told him to stay put because it looks as though he's doing better with her than I am.  She gets mad and leaves the party. I followed.  Another time in a bar we or she is a little tipsy and sees a guy she knew had a crush on her...she walks over very provocatively and gives him a huge hug.  I'm right there! Really?!  More recently she starts texting a buddy of mine who is a known cheater, he split from his wife due to him, her and 2 friends swinging and ended badly.  She starts telling him how she wants to lose weight, he called her "beautiful" and not beat herself up then asked her to join him at his gym. She either didn't reply or deleted it. As we were talking about him one day(by the way she has no idea I saw her conversation with him) she tells me, "you know honey if our relationship wasn't as strong as it is I could see myself..." Then she caught herself and completely changed the subject.  Another time she was flirting with another male friend of mine and wanted to grade his beard...kind of intimate thing to do...she and another friend wanted to start jogging together.  I see them flirt a lot and I'm uneasy with this.  A male co worker liked her new car so she gave him a ride  2-1/2 hours later they came back and in different clothes  they changed clothing?  I give her plenty of attention but she often mocks me, and is very vulgar about it  her apology, "I'm sorry you took it that way" she told me in front of the jogger that I should get on my knees for front of him, his wife and a few other friends.  Our kids are out, our house and everything is paid off and we have a good savings  I really don't need this anymore.  I'm thinking that I'd be better off from a broken marriage than in one.  Please give me a few tips...she's pushed me so far I don't know if I want the old Josey back  


Tags: Friend; Kids;

Thank you for voting.


Monday, April 18, 2016 9:06 AM

Leave man, she's definitely doing some shady stuff. No answer without the friend for 6 hours? 2 and a half hour drive and different clothes? She's just Embarrassing you. You can be happier alone knowing no one is doing you dirty.

Wednesday, April 20, 2016 3:03 AM

Even if she hasn't fucked anyone (which is unlikely) she is a nasty bitch. She does not respect you, she is not hinest with you, she does not love you. Not one of the three most important things of a marriage are present in your marriage. You can either invistigate and get the truth first for the sake of your peace of mind, or you can just divorce her. In most states, divorcing for adultery is not worth the effort, it is useful as a chip in family politics. Your kids will view her as the problem for the rest of her life and you as the injured party. This will become important at future family gatherings and such. Either way, you are headed for a divorce. My advice is see a lawyer and start preparing to protect yourself financially, she will try to rape you in the settlement - be prepared.

Thursday, April 21, 2016 10:24 PM

Leave her. If she begs you not to leave, ignore her. If she doesn't, then asks you to come back later on, don't go back. She ain't worth it anymore

Saturday, April 23, 2016 12:04 AM

Shes not worth it. Warn her shes married to you and if she doesn't value it she is free to walk out. If she still wants to play double game, cut loose. Youre kids will understand.

Saturday, April 23, 2016 1:31 AM

This is an easy one..  just leave her and get divorce bro.. she will be revengeful during the divorce process.. so get ready.  Good luck!

Sunday, April 24, 2016 8:32 AM

It's sad, reading this, everyone says you should leave.  Unfortunately, they are right, I went through EXACTLY the same thing.  I agree with several others, if she hasn't already cheated (and it is very likely she has), she will very soon.  There is nothing you can do to turn this train wreck around, it is HER problem...

Sunday, April 24, 2016 8:57 PM
Constantine XI

Keep in mind that when you become elderly you will need assisted living. Will you trust this vengeful woman to not abuse you when you are no longer able to fend for yourself? 

Monday, April 25, 2016 6:52 PM

its Tuesday night about 9:30 and she stormed into my office screaming at me for this blog.  She's found it somehow and can't believe I'm sharing this with strangers. So I replied that she should have taken this into consideration when she was doing these things.  I asked her to take everything I've written and try to explain. Where were you for six hours in AC? Why did you come back after a long drive in a car that I bought with a change of clothing?  Now it's gets better. She and a few friends go to Florida for a week as sort of a wives getaway. The girls were over the other night and while my wife was in the bathroom I was quizzing her friends about the "guys they plan on meeting" down in the keys.  One girl said, "wow I didn't think we were supposed to talk about that". Now I know that all of these women are cheating. They all go every year. Now I've learned that they are meeting guys down there.  I was just making it up. They are leaving on Thursday and I didn't let her know that I know but I'm sure the other girls have to her about it. I feel her walking on eggshells around me. My plan is to put my wedding band in her luggage and when she calls from Ft.Laurderdale I'm gonna spring not on her that everything of hers will be out front and if she wants her stuff to call her mom to get it.  She's sitting a few feet from me right now trying to make nice. This will ruin her vacation for sure. I'm gonna sit my kids down and explain what's going on, truthfully and honestly. As soon as she leaves the house I'm calling the credit card companies and cancelling her cards.  I'm going to clean out our joint accounts and put everything in a safe deposit box. I'm also thinking of selling my home to my brother for $1 so she can't go after that. She will have nothing. She deserves nothing. 

Monday, April 25, 2016 9:05 PM

Sounds like an amazing plan. Keep updating this I want to know what she does when she finds out. You deserve better my friend. Don't worry someone is out there waiting for you. Oh man I can't wait!

Wednesday, April 27, 2016 9:35 AM

Interesting, she explodes when you blog about her activities but has she given any reasons for her actions.  She must expect that you are not buying the stories and yet she is still going to FL, why?  Maybe she expects you to give into her sexual explorations without a fight because she has been there for you in the past.  Only the future can change, the past is the past and the present is now.  You need to decide if this is the life for you, it appears that she is into anything that excites her and that could mean bringing home STD's, AIDS, etc..  Please update and let us know how it turns out, most cheaters (male or female) don't understand the consequences of theit actions until to late.  Get a medical check while you are at it, AIDS, Hep C, etc. are all killers if you don't know they are there.

Wednesday, April 27, 2016 11:50 AM

sorry for the confusion. I got my days mixed up. I've since called the dr to get tested and I'm going in tomorrow. Very embarrassing because he's been my primary for ever.  So she's at work and has most of her luggage packed.  I snoop and find that she packed some very sexy lingerie, stuff I've not seen. Carefully I took it out and replaced it with my old boxers. When she sees the boxers and pulls them out, my wedding band will be in them. I think she will get the hint.  I'm sure she will call me but I'm shutting off my cell. When she tries to make any purchases she will be denied. She won't be able to get me off of her mind. Every time they go out she'll need to borrow money and that will grow on her. My plan is set. I'm trying to stay calm as to not give her any clue of what I'm about to do. In my eyes all she is now is a mother to my kids and nothing more. The crap I've taken from her, the verbal abuse, emotionally I'm spent. She's always been somewhat of a bully I was just blinded to it. I want to thank you for replying and offering suggestions and advice. My family attorney is actually drawing up papers and I'm changing my will. Everything goes to the kids. She has some money in her account but our joint account and my account are frozen. I withdrew our joint cash and placed it in a safe deposit box in my bank. I was ni king of packing her stuff while she's away but nah. I'm not gonna waste any more time on her than I have to. The idea of revenge seems sweet but it's not me. I feel that what's about to happen to her will be enough. I'm also ready to confront my buddy, the womanizer to see if in fact they've hooked up. My knowing that these women are plan6ning on meeting other guys down there prompts me to inform the other husbands. I think I'm going to copy these posts and invite them over for a beer and let them read these themselves. The girls leave tomorrow, should I invite the guys soon? Tonight? Perhaps we meet out at a local pub or restaurant.  What do you think?? 

Wednesday, April 27, 2016 3:37 PM

You should tell all of them and explain your plan to them have them join in. Imagine all those bitches finding they got dumped at the same time. Lol keep updating want to know how they react. Good luck bro.

Wednesday, April 27, 2016 3:47 PM

Meeting is set for tonight at Ruby Tuesdays.  All but one is going to show up.  We are not all good friends but good enough. We do stuff together so us getting together does not send red flags up. Let's see what happens. I'm just sipping a beer waiting for 7pm to roll around.  Wish me luck. 

Thursday, April 28, 2016 5:47 AM

Sorry for your pain.  From the comments I have read, it would appear that she has two conditions going on here.  The first is a control issue where she has to "bully" you for emotional superiority and financial security.  The other appears to be a selfish "me" attitude where only her desires matter.  On the other hand, you said she knew of this blog.  If so, is she tracking it and knows what is going down.  If so, be prepared for the worst  - bullys don't have limits.  I hope this works out well for you and please update when possible.

Thursday, April 28, 2016 7:37 PM

So how did ur wife react? Did the plan work?  Keep updating the suspense is killing me

Friday, April 29, 2016 5:54 AM

Curious about the whole blog.  If this true, you have no choice but to get out of the marriage.  On the ther hand, if this is a fantasy blog bring on the next chapter.  Here are some suggested endings.

 1.  Your Ruby Tuesday ambush turns into a counter ambush and you find out you are in an open relationship.  The other husbands all know and you are invited to transfer from the "Cheating Wives Club" to the "Swingers Club".

 2.  Your lab reports are bad and you decide to go out in ablaze of glory.

 3.  The "Cheating Wives Club" get their just rewards.

Update the meeting and her leaving on her trip, and don't let her "bully"  you anymore.

Saturday, April 30, 2016 6:49 AM

Well she's absolutely pissed.  The other husbands are also pissed, some in disbelief but these threads are making sense to all of us.  The one guy who didn't come to meet us was contacted by his wife with and that supposedly didn't end well. I explained to my soon to be ex that her stuff will be waiting out front.  Since she's been trying like hell to contact me. I'm very happy that her vacation is ruined and she ruined a huge part of my life.  What the other guys do is totally their business and I just wanted them to know what the girls were up to. I doubt we will ever get the entire true story but at this point I'm not really interested in hearing her.  I don't know how long a divorce takes in NJ but I hope with her infidelity the papers get filed quick and I get out as fast as possible.  They have a few days now to come up with a story and I'm sure they'll make it seem true and honest but I know better.  The emotions going through me are unbelievable. The pain, the anger and now the hate. 

Saturday, April 30, 2016 10:29 AM

She is still in florida? Lol I bet she was surprised. Keep updating everybody wants to know what she says when u guys meet face to face

Sunday, May 1, 2016 7:22 AM

It's Sunday morning and she has been trying to text, Clara, pm me every way she can. She's been talking to me kids, trying to get them to believe her.  They're smart kids and very perceptive. She's contacted a few mutual friends who have since called me to talk. I don't want anyone else involved. My old buddy is avoiding me like the plague and he will get his... Her clothing from her dressers is all stuffed into some old luggage and a few boxes in out foyer as its raining and I cant put it out in the rain. I have no idea what she's doing for money and yes, she's still in florida.  The last few days for me have been pure misery. It's so easy to sound like I'm fine but I'm a mess. Not sleeping right and not really eating. Kids are stronger than I thought they'd be. That's a good sign.  So damn mad, frustrated, confused, enraged and sad all at the same time not going in to work tomorrow because I'm meeting my attorney. He'll have some answers for me.  I really need guidance here. 

Sunday, May 1, 2016 10:45 AM

Moving forward is better than standing still.  Have you thought about the kids being aware of a problem but not telling you because they didn't want to hurt you anymore then you are already being hurt (perceptive).  Stay in touch with the other husbands.  These women have put it all on the line for a fun time, now they are going to have to band together to survive.  They might be the "Cheating wives club" but you may have to become the "Husbands of cheating wives" support group to avoid them ganging up on any one of you singlely.  Also to keeep in mind, if one of the other wives caves and tells all, this will be more material for your divorce.  As for these women, most people who get a panic call (like the one who called her Husband), wouldn't you rush back to deal with the crisis.  This lack of action may be due to "fun time comes first" (me first and everyone last) and they are convinced that they can make you believe anything (suuperiority complex).  Finally, don't bother yourself about the "womanizer" because it will just lead to more lies that create frustration and confusion, rage and anger, and more sadness - move on and take care of yourself.  Update for more advice.

Monday, May 2, 2016 4:50 AM

Guest, thanks for the advice.  I've taken it to heart. I did want to confront my ex buddy but as you said it's just going to be a sh$t show there.  I've been looking at her fb posts and pictures and in almost every photo there is the same guy. Different places in the keys, different time and he's wearing different clothing. I think this is her boo.  It's not evidence but for me it's pretty much the last nail in her coffin. I'm guessing my kids are in contact with her and she knows what's going on and simply does not care.  I gotta say this is completely killing me inside.  I have spoken to the kids but have not asked the,mid they knew. That would bring them into this mess and I won't do that to them. I believe that they will want to stay with me but it's gotta be their call. 

Shes been down there since Thursday and coming back Tuesday midnight.  I not looking forward to that encounter. Not at all.  Most of my ducks are lined up. I was advised not to go selling my home to my brother and just to relax a bit, take a few deep breaths etc.  with out question this is the most emotionally draining and damaging thing a man could eatxperience. I've been loyal to that woman, completely and after the way I feel now I know that I would never want to put another person through this.  I'm a grown man, a very masculine and alpha man but I just want to cry...??? It's gone from disbelief to hate, anger, rage, resentment, and now it's just sad.  I have really no one to talk to about this. I need to be strong for my kids, can't allow my bro or his family see me break down.  Jesus. This is so 54 can I start over?  I don't know. I get the overwhelming sense that my importance has gone from very high to non existent. Many things are going through my head right now.  

Monday, May 2, 2016 5:17 AM

You are not starting over, it ended when you found out about her activities.  I agree with the writer who said move ahead, that's not starting over but accepting the now and plan for the future (without her).  As for the kids, no need to drag them into this (this is between you and her).  Look at it this way, at 54, you have 20-25 more years to meet and connect with people who will make your life better, not bullied into submission.  Pain will subside with people who care about you (not seing that happen with your wife who seems to like to inflict pain on you).  As for the other man, let you lawyer deal with that, that's what is there for.  Finally, stand back, take a deep breath, stay firm, and close the chapter on this book - there are other books out there to open and enjoy.  Please keep us updated because what she does next will be validation for these following this blog and may shed light for others that may be in your shoes.

Monday, May 2, 2016 6:35 AM

Guest, thank you. I really needed to hear that. As far as starting over, I just don't know if I have the energy or desire to go through that again. Is there another woman out there for me? I don't even want to think about that right now. But I do hear you loud and clear. The anxiety is starting to subside but the pounding inside my chest is cause for concern. I'm going to see my GP to explain that I may need some mess to relax. I had to fight not to turn to alcohol as. Need a clear head and especially for my kids. I have to be strong. Her parents are privileged to this info and I think she will be staying there upon her return. I don't want revenge or to make her suffer...I just want her to go away. Funny how next weekend is Mother's Day.  I wonder how many men will bring her flowers. She is still the mother to my kids so if they plan something for her that's fine, but I want no part of it. My attorney says I really need to talk to her and she needs to talk too. I asked if he would let us meet at his office and he could moderate and help keep it civil and he agreed.  He has worked over the weekend on drawing up papers and we will need to go before a judge but she has to admit to adultry for this to go quickly. With the evidence I have and her laptop with correspondence I think it's a done deal. She will have little choice 

Monday, May 2, 2016 7:28 AM

From not starting over guest:  No need for thanks, you asked for advice and if what I said helps, then pass it on to someone else who may be suffering.  It was never my intentions to say go looking for a new relationship, what I mean is that there are all types of people looking for happiness not sex.  I read in the blog about the other husbands; a support group of individuals who are going through the same thing can actually re-energize the group to move forward (like AA, MADD, etc), all groups that bring energy back by sharing similar issues. Keep in touch with your doctor (you will have medical issues, maybe PTSD), your lawyer (he is there to moderate the terms of the conflict) and, your family (whose love will be an anchor to secure you during the ups and downs of this).  As for the legalities of adutery, getting evidence for that is not why you need to move on - you need to move on because of the LIES, EMOTIONAL DISTRESS, and SELFISHNESS she has inflicted on you.  If you need more advice, update and I will try and help because thinking that you are alone when others will listen and respond is the only way to put aside the loneliness.  

Monday, May 2, 2016 9:30 AM

Just home from the dr's office and feeling a little better.  I'm actually enjoying hearing from you. I would like to know something about you if you don't mind me asking.  Are you male or female? What is your age (generally if woman I'm sorry to ask. Lol) and profession?  You are very intuitive and have really offered me a huge shoulder to lean on and learn from. I enjoy how you interpret and break down what I'm going thru. Just writing here brings me some comfort.  Knowing and anticipating words of wisdom or advice and encouragement. Two of the other husbands are meting me tonight to discuss this whole mess. We want to compare notes to try and figure when this all really started. The girls are almost inseparable. Interchangeable except my wife. Great looking, great figure, great cook but personality has gone by the wayside. Never in the past has any of us thought that there was something going on. I believe the guy in the pics may have flown down with them only because his skin is not tan at all.  If her were a native of fla he'd be a little dark. So this trip may have completely been prearranged with others meeting up with our wives. How mush does this suck? Imagine if us 5 men were to schedule an annual rendezvous with other women to fly down and meet us for a week of fun and sex? No strings attached? Well as far as I can tell there are emotions between them. My lawyers guy still has her laptop and just now I'm wondering if it's picking up her emails to him or if she's just texting or calling. Cell records are being taken too. We will have call numbers, quantity, actual time of day and how often. I'm still amazed at how they kept this a secret for so long. When I was joking asking about the guys they're meeting only one girl (Karen) made a comment. The rest grew very still and silent. I just pretended to brush it off but that in and of itself had me become Sherlock Holmes.  I think the husbands should ask their wives to be upfront and honest and I'd bet Karen cracks. Very sweet girl but weak that way. None will ever be associating with me or the people in my circle. If these guys accept their wives back I will need to disassociate with them.  

Getting back to an earlier comment I thought you were suggesting me throwing my hat back in the dating arena. It's starting to make perfect sense to me but it'll be a while.  Has to be after the divorce is settled.  I never thought I would hate my wife. But I do. For what she has done to me.  Gotta go.  Stuff to do. Thanks buddy. She has stopped bombing my cell so I guess shes getting the hint. 

Monday, May 2, 2016 2:33 PM

First of all, not suggesting you throw your hat in the ring - you are going to need time to adjust and take care of yourself.  Not to say you can't meet people, just put yourself first and let the rest happen after you get to a good place in your life.  As for me - I'm 59 and male, retired from the military as an officer and now work in Max A prison for a second pension.  Seen alot of bad stuff so this isn't something new to me.  As for the other husbands, don't write them off because they aren't in your circle, they are sharing the same issue with the same people and that gives you something in common to work through (call it a group project).  As for keeping secrets - if you don't look, you probably won't see it until it's too far gone (nobody expected John Gotti to take over the Gambino family until it was a done deal).  You trusted her and she abused that trust, don't blame yourself for her short comings.

Monday, May 2, 2016 5:32 PM

 I've been following this since the original posting, checking often for updates. I am rooting for you. Be sure to stand your ground, don't believe a word she say unless she has proof. What do your kids have to say? Do they have your back?

Not saying you had the option, but if I were in this situation, I would have followed her ass down to Florida. Try to get proof.

Nonetheless, I'm praying for you, waiting for her to get her just desserts. Keep your chin up.

Wednesday, May 4, 2016 4:41 AM

My guess is that the advice helped and you are moving on.  Validaion of the advice would be nice though, because it gives importance to a blog of this nature in that you were looking for advice and not sympathy.  Try and update and let us know how you and things in general are doing.  

Thursday, May 5, 2016 3:16 AM

Today is Thursday and I've been going through an array of emotions.  My lawyer has all the paperwork and evidence of her adultry in line. There was apparently a few men in her life besides me. Her laptop was full or her correspondence. After meeting with my attorney and his associate (the guy who was able to locate the correspondence in her laptop) it's absolutely a done deal.  She knows that we have everything and asked my attorney to keep the names of her male friends private.  By no means are we subject to her desires.  As it turns out she was not taking as good of care of my children as I thought.  Apparently she has been cheating on me for years. She's bragged to her boyfriends about how oblivious I've been.  I chalked it up to absolute trust. She had been dropping the kids off at her mothers house over the years and she even talked about how her mother knew and disapproved but loved seeing the kids.  Isn't that nice...she couldn't even give me a heads up about my adulterous wife...

Now I'm completely numb.  I can never share this info with my kids because it could really hurt their relationship with the nonna.  I'm mad at her but she was in a bad position. As far as my soon to be ex's boyfriends I think I will make sufficient copies of their individual correspondence and confront them.  I may contact their wives as well so they know what pieces of garbage they've been with.  I'm a big boy and I'm not worried about embarrassment.  I'll deal with that as it comes.  The STBX has been doing everything she can to get me to sit down and talk this out. From my perspective there is nothing to discuss except her total and absolute surrender.  I want nothing from her but also want to give her nothing. House, camper, boat, autos, and especially the kids. They'll be off to school soon and need a stable environment. She's been staying at her moms house and that's probably where she'll stay.  Our town is a small one and word will spread like wild fire. She will most likely have to relocate. With her lousy attitude and mean disposition she won't find it easy.  But that's not my problem anymore.  Hopefully this will run its course, it may get complicated but according to my lawyer it's pretty much an open and shut case. My biggest pain comes from what I've read in her emails.  It's such a shame that our entire relationship was a lie. What and who I thought she was is not who she is. I find some comfort sharing my experiences here and thank you all for words of encouragement.  I also appreciate that no one was dropping the bomb on her.  My advice to anyone out there who has a gut feeling to act on it. Be sure you have open communication, don't be a door mat. I was and I think I was not enough of a challenge to her because I made it easy. I always thought I was in a good relationship/marriage. Pay close attention and for me personally I will never give a woman my total and complete trust.  She took that from me.  I am currently in counseling, well it starts next Monday.  I will not be in contact with my mother in law as she was an enabler to her daughter.   As far as my kids, I will not try to sway them in any direction. They're very perceptive and adult enough to make their own decisions. Time will tell, time will heal. To use a sports analogy, I'm rounding third base and the coach is waving me in. Once I cross home plate the game is over and I'll move on. Again. Thank you all. You were a huge help for me in many ways. 


Thursday, May 5, 2016 5:37 AM

Working in a prison, I can tell you some of the things that may happen at this point.  Now that the con game has blown up in her face she will blame you (not there for her and try to bully you back), blame the system (everyone else is doing it so why blame me), and point fingers at anyone she can (they made me do it).  Don't expect her to admit it was her fault.  As for the other men, she now knows that she is the other woman and the all the lifes she has destroyed will come crashing down on her head and result in public shunning (who wants to be around a home wrecker).  You still haven't said what is up with the other husbands in this mess (are they moving on or are they accepting this.  The children will have to deal with this but don't pressure them into anything, they may have known that getting dropped off at nonnas was not right (where is mommy going?).  Fianlly, the mother in law was an enabler and just as much a problem in this affair (let your lawyer deal with her).  An update about where you are going, status of the other husbands involved, and mental staus would be greatly appreciated.  Take care and recover, learn to trust again (if not in others then in yourself).

Saturday, May 7, 2016 7:53 PM

Any updates?

Monday, May 16, 2016 9:09 PM

any updates George? Also I hate to say this, but because of my own past I need to. Are you sure the kids are yours?

Monday, May 30, 2016 5:38 PM

ok. Latest update. Sorry it took so long but much has been happening. I kicked her to the curb.  My kids didn't need to take sides but they chose me.  She's a mess.  I made sure everyone knew what was going on. I sent copies of her correspondence with him to her family, my family, her place of employment and many of our closest friends. She's been basically cut off at the knees.  I don't care where she is or what happens to her for that matter. It seems like she was just using me as a "means" for her economically.  Due tomorrow maher reactions I had put a restraining order on her so she can't be anywhere near me, my home or work.  From what I've heard no one wants anything to do with her.  Seems that she's been flirts no with a lot of our friends husbands all along so the wives are done with her as well.  I can say this, I'll never fall for a woman like I did with her ever again.  

Monday, May 30, 2016 6:53 PM
Same boat

I would like another update. What is she actually saying to you? Does she want to reconcile? Is she begging you not to stop? I'm asking because I'm going thru the EXACT same thing. I've been married 10 years and my wife has been having a 2 year affair with her best friends husband. I'm lost and don't know what to do. Everyone and I mean EVERYONE has cut her off. Friends family church memebers. And she's begging me to reconcile but I feel as if it's not the people she hurt that she feels sorry for its herself that she feels sorry for. I don't believe she loves me. I feel as if I was just the perfect image for the public friends and family but when the sun goes down the real her comes out. I would like an update to know what she wants and how your handlING this. Any advice for me based on your experience? Cuz I'm lost here

Monday, May 30, 2016 8:14 PM

To Same boat,

Leave her. She has been lying to you for the last 2 years there is no way you can trust her again so your relationship is ruined. Her cheating is a reflection of her character not yours so look up and try to live happily. There is someone better just waiting for you to arrive. Good luck. 

Wednesday, June 1, 2016 5:34 AM
Guest 1

Sounds like you've moved on physically but it'll take time mentally! Pleased you've got some councilling arranged, keep close to your kids and reassure them that everything will be OK - I know this will very difficult initially but time is a great healer!

Once the trust has been broken, especially on this scale - it's very difficult if not impossible to go back! On reflection, you've looked at the whole relationship and maybe seen it for what it is as opposed to what you thought it was!

Talking about these situations and posting your story should help but only do it whilst it does! Good luck!

Monday, August 15, 2016 10:31 AM

I would really like an update on this post. What's been going on lately


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