ok well i have complete remorse and regret for what i did. never in a million years did i ever think i would be the one to cheat, if anything i thought i would always be the one to get cheated on, but anyway, it all started when i moved to a whole new college. my boyfriend (& yes boyfriend not ex) was very worried that i would cheat on him seeing as though we met eachother in january and we were only together until april. after april we went our separate ways. anyway righty when i got to my new place of setting, he was very worried and controlling. he just didn't want me talking to any other guy or entertaining any guy at all. well about a month in to my new place, i ended up going out with everyone who inhabits the same place as me, i ended up meeting this one guy who is coincidentally from the same place i'm from. the night i went out,  i randomly left the people i went out with, idk why, but i did, i ended up back in my room & the guy (let's call him jack) texts me saying "i hope you got in safe tonight" etc etc. and eventually ends up asking me to come over to chill with him i immediately decline his invitation and say goodnight to him, end of story. well the next day we all go out again and i end up leaving the group and the same thing happens the next night, like the little invitation to go to his room. my dumb ass actually says yes this time, but i try to establish yea i have a bf but don't do any fuckboy stuff, and that totally proves inferior bc i ended up making out with him & it was just that. just making out. as the weeks went on i started going to his room almost every night just chilling with him and then one night we ended up having sex & after that one night we just continuously had sex. i don't know why i let myself do it. i think it was because i just wanted to do what i wanted and i just didn't care about anyone but myself. but this little thing i had with jack carried on for about 2 weeks before i sadly told my boyfriend who actually didn't want to break up with me, but he wanted to stay with me, he just obviously wanted me to stop messing around. after my little shindig  with jack happened i was reckless, i would tell my boyfriend yea i'm done messing around i just want u etc. and go right back to jacks room and sleep with him. (legit sleep bc we had work in the morning) and for the 4th of july i ended up having sex with 2 other guys but anyway, once i got back from my weekend of 4th of july i told my boyfriend i was done with it forreal. i ended up messing with 1 other guy. and that has totally shown me that karma is a bitch and lying to the one who actually loves you will cost you some heartache of your own.

Anyway, in the end i learned my lesson, i'm never cheating again. and if i ever do think about wanting to be with someone even just for a 1 night thing then i would think being with this unbelievable guy just isn't for me. i have caused him too much heartache. it's hard trying to regain someone's trust back after you've demolished it time after time.